What would you rather?

Is it better to live sth but then be obliged to leave and miss...or not live anything..not know anything about those people,those places..
Sometimes i ask myself, when i become extremely nostalgic and meloncolic, if it would be easier being totally unaware of Flekke..Would it?
If someone told me many years before that i would go to a land, where there are northern lights, all the time rainy, depressing days, and sometimes all the time lightful days..i would give them a Kip Somner look and say: "are you kidding me? "
But..but..I did it..i have been to there..And now, many times i feel nostalgic..remember the places i have been..i feel like, norway was my real home.
In 3weeks i m going home for winter break.And i have this weird feeling..I feel as if i m going back to norway..i dont know why..One of my friends here, who is from RCN as well,a third year, told me once that her nationality has become UWC since she graduated from RCN and came here..I m exactly the same..
Would i feel better if i have never been to there, never known all those people? No...
Yes, i wouldnt be remembering all those memories of past,or feeling sad because of longing for them..Because i wouldnt even know that they exist..
On the other hand, i also wouldnt have those weird memories, the kind of the ones which one can live and experience only once.I wouldnt have started smoking,if i hadnt gone to norway and had IB stress..(can you believe it..what a pity it would be if i hadnt started smoking:) )or..i wouldnt know about gazillion different languages that exists in this planet..(well i still cannot speak, but i know what they are at least) I wouldnt laugh at people when they were trying to imitate other people's languages..
But, i also wouldnt be remembering these, most probably wouldnt be studying here in US, (which wouldnt be a lost, at all), wouldnt be someone who thinks about the past a lot..
I dont know..Hard to answer..What do you think? Can you answer for me..Would you rather.....

P.S:Pictures are taken in Norway, by another blogger i know..Northern lights and the college at night.They are 100% natural, no artificial lights or reflections..

What would you rather?